THE FEMALE ORGASM AND THE RAINBOW OF FIRE

We have talked in the past of the Holy Braille of the female body, the G Spot, and how surgeons are trying to increase the prominence of the point to enhance sexual pleasure for the female. Now, my old and royal leaders, loyal readers know how much I care for female empowerment.

Rainbow Of Fire

Ladies and more ladies, there are many potentially path-breaking developments in the evolution of female sexuality. I am just wondering how long science is going to take to help women reach the present glow of sexual tightness lightness in which I find myself most of the time.
A point of grammatical digression, is the state of being lit by light ‘lightness’ or ‘light’ (apart from ‘enlightenment’)? Anyways.
As many of you do know, most women don’t manage to reach orgasms because the guys are too busy trying to finish off things to catch the next Tube homewards, or because the female system requirements are overwhelming the male hardware specs, akin to a Vista installation in an XP machine. Man, too much upgradation required, ain’t it?
There is hope, short of dumping the guy and getting a proper stud to right things for you.
A stimulator, for one.
Huh? No, I am not talking of vibrators and sex toys, because I am an Indian, and neither my culture, nor my country’s laws, permit me to use such things. Besides, I am a guy whose fingers vibrate, a sort of premature Parkinson’s disease.
A spinal nerve stimulator is a device like a pack of cigarettes, implanted under the skin of the buttock (how imaginative!), that stimulates the nerves of the spinal cord. This is used to treat chronic back pain, and was found to lead to female orgasms.
Female orgasm is a phenomenon as rare as a Rainbow Of Fire, but less so than mutual orgasms and multiple orgasms, which are more often found in colorful scatologic accounts than in reality.
The sexual anatomy of the female is still now, in this modern day and age, controversial, as is the concept of female sexuality. Sample some of these:

1. Is the clitoris a magic button?
Er, no. It seems it is much bigger than previously described. From the descriptions of sexologists, I imagined it to be extending up to the back part of the tongue, but actually it seems to extend up to the G spot.

2. Is there a G spot?
Yes and no. There is no single, tiny pinhead, but the G spot, which is described as a point in the front wall of the vagina, between 11 and 1 o’clock (now don’t ask if it is AM or PM), seems to be linked with pelvic nerves, and hence the erogenous area is more extensive than thought to be. Men should heave a sigh of relief, as they don’t need to be wizards at G-spot mapping, and trouble their women even more by their hopeful and hopeless explorations.

3. If a male ejaculates, what does a female do?
Some females also do so. There is a urethral fluid, around 2 to 5 ml, that comes out, especially in the female on top position.

4. What is the source of a female orgasm: the clitoris, the vagina, or the G spot?
A lot of sources, with plenty of variations in individuals. While the orgasm in the male is linear, in the female it is more circular, or non-linear. Check out this highly readable article by Germaine Greer.

So, what aids adjuncts do women have to enhance or actuate their own orgasms?
I quote from an article:

Eros: approved 2000 by FDAβ€”a clitoral suction device that increases blood flow and lubrication is out on the market.
Intrinsa: testosterone patch from P&G (refused FDA approval until more long term research is done) but looks very promising in clinical trials.
PT-141: nasal spray to increase blood flow and arousal by targeting the CNS (melanocortin agonist) not out yet.
LibiGe: testosterone gel Phase III clinical trials.
EstraVil: non-prescription herbal remedy that makes some pretty outlandish claims. This has NOT had to go through FDA approval or testing.

All these are in addition to the Rabbit vibrator, which Greer endorses.

So, no more need to tolerate messophilic, tooth-picking, serially eructating exhibitionists just for that one anniversarial orgasmic tickle.
Get a stimulator, or something else, and get your man laid off!

22 responses to “THE FEMALE ORGASM AND THE RAINBOW OF FIRE

  1. HUMOROUS AND INSIGHTFUL AT THE SAME TIME.

  2. πŸ™‚ new words born today – Tightness

    what has testosterone got to do fr female stimulation – i have heard pheromones help but this i could nt figure out
    Even Madonna likes the Rabit

    question to me is what would an indian woman prefer a cleaner kitchen or a orgasm?

    Prax,
    Testosterone in females is a big area of research. It stimulates female sexuality.

  3. Thanks doc for taking your time to comment on my blog.One man army here-I look for interesting articles and clip them.My intention is to make my blog a “signboard” which directs readers to good content in blogospshere.

    Regards,
    xntricpundits (Dr.Reddy)

  4. Wow! If medical journals and textbooks would have been written in this way, I wouldn’t have gone for engineering! πŸ™‚

    Great to have you back, doc!

    Medical textbooks are written this way, Mahendra. It’s just that you have to add the jokes and spice with your mind’s resources.
    πŸ™‚

  5. Rambodoc, consider writing books for the kids (err I mean teens). πŸ˜€

    Priyank,
    My whole blog is dedicated to the noble cause of children’s education and benign entertainment.
    But I appreciate your point.

  6. cental board of direct taxes
    http://incometaxindia.gov.in/cbdt/Org.asp

    im off blogging for a while.

    For those of you puzzled by this comment, he was referring to a comment in his blog.

  7. Enlighten me, oh, the wise one! I read somewhere that the Indian male has a significant… er… size problem, so much so that the condom manufacturers had to redesign their production lines! Is the Indian female’s sexual anatomy evolved to compensate for this in any manner, or is it so that the only recourse to empower the Indian male is to study the sculptures of Khajuraho, and practice the impossible Tantrobatics?

    While on the subject, is there any poll (of Indian women) to suggest, “It’s not size, stupid!”?

    TRF,
    The female anatomy is adaptable and expandable enough to taking in a little finger as well as a fist, and fitting snugly to each. So Indians can also feel like studs, though I really doubt this size issue. At least, looking at ….
    πŸ˜€

  8. Thank you for an interesting and enlightening post! πŸ™‚

  9. It seems u r a learned hakim/vaidya… or a qualified medical practitioner ??
    Though this piece of writing was educative ….but it was the picture which caught all my attention, it was speaking a lot…..
    πŸ˜‰

    I am not exactly a hakim. You can call me a huck* quim. I am actually a specialist in rainbow sex. It is actually too complex and colorful to explain.
    And, now that you mention it, blog stats have shown that of the thousands of people who visit this blog every day, 97.5% have only come in to look at this exciting photograph.

    * read explanation # six.

  10. Nita ji is right , keep up the good work..
    why don’t you consider full time journalism..i am fed up of reading Bachi Karkaria’s column, no doubt she is one of the best..
    I presume rainbow sex is some sort of abstract art.. and those 97.5 % people were too learned to read and learn from this writing.

    Yeah, abstract is right…but art? I dunno…

  11. Pingback: DESIGNER VAGINA: LIP SERVICE? « A Twist of Word and Mind

  12. Really educative piece, only regret that I came to know of it so late . With the few active years left , I feel like setting out for the kill with this armament of knowledge.

  13. Somnath,
    Welcome to this blog, and all the best in your pursuits. But, beware, this is not for the pussy-footed!
    πŸ™‚

  14. was interesting, but didn’t help in how to please a women, as a guy. could you help with that

  15. Good post…only pratical information i got was about the G spot location (10-11)…thnks for it..

    And about theoritical knowledge..well it reminds me of our biology teacher who started with Reproductive systems as the first chapter in paper II… πŸ™‚

    nice post all in all..
    Dont mind…but no female expressed their opinion /ideas here…

  16. Oh wow!! I love this post!

  17. Pingback: DESIGNER VAGINA: LIP SERVICE? « Pizzarebbe’s Weblog

  18. Pingback: THE FEMALE ORGASM AND THE RAINBOW OF FIRE « Pizzarebbe’s Weblog

  19. Try the A spot orgasm. The A spot is 3-4 inches on the front wall of the vagina. First you “train it” to orgasm with your middle finger, then you have sex.

    Harry Mete
    http://www.1stop4femaleorgasms.com

  20. Alexwebmaster

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  21. Do fabulous job! Women really loves rabbit vibrator as these sex toys are become one of the icons in the adult sextoy market.

  22. Seems I have stumbled upon the best blog post title ever.

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