THERE ARE LOTS OF SUBSTITUTES FOR HARD WORK!

My twelve year-old son is presenting a debate in favor of the motion: “THERE ARE LOTS OF SUBSTITUTES FOR HARD WORK!”
I present his thesis for your disapproval.
Start speech.

Let us look at what one would do hard work for.
A story first.
A man was lying under a tree, listening to the sound of singing birds.
Another man came by and accosted him: “Why don’t you go and do some hard work?”
“And then do what?”
“Then you can get a good job, and earn a lot of money.”
“And then do what?”
“Then you can eat well, sleep well, and enjoy your life!”
“What do you think I am doing now?”

So, friends, life is not all about hard work.

Let us say a word in favor of the opposite concept: laziness.

Now, people tend to look down on lazy people (like me) but, with my vast experience, let me tell you, laziness is no bunny-job. Try doing NOTHING. Just try it. You will instantly give it up. If you practise long and hard, and get really lazy, maybe the Guinness Book people will recognise you for record-breaking levels of doing nothing, and you could make a pot of money and get immortalised in the record books.

In addition, if we all got lazy, and did nothing, we would emit less heat. We would reduce so much of the heat that is part of Global Warming these days! If we all become citizens of Lazipore, our successful reduction of atmospheric temperatures could inspire a documentary by National Geographic channel or somebody. How far is a Nobel Prize away from this point? Only a few more sleepy days!

So, how about laziness as a substitute for hard work?

Not that there aren’t more of these.

I strongly recommend bathroom singing as a replacement for hard work. Bathroom singing can drive out all the rats and cockroaches from your house, if you can learn to sing like me. Why, by doing so, I have successfully driven out even the stray dogs and cats in my street! Now, you no longer run the risk of getting bitten on your backside if you want to come home to give me an iPod or something. So, no pesticides, no injections, just some songs, Bollywood at its, er, best. The animal rights people won’t exactly be unhappy!

Watch cartoons, too! Science is now saying that kids who watch TV are more likely to be smarter and cleverer, and their reflexes are faster. So, can hard work do this for you? Probably, but with such a better option, who cares?

I had planned to list a few more substitutes to talk about, but I didn’t have time. Too busy lazing around, you see?! Laziness at my level is a lot of hard work!
While there are substitutes for hard work, there is no substitute to laziness!

End speech.

17 responses to “THERE ARE LOTS OF SUBSTITUTES FOR HARD WORK!

  1. Are you sure your son wrote that? Sounds like the handiwork of some doctor whose name starts with an “r”?
    I hate to say it, but the boy is right ! I know someone who dabbles with stock market, and makes a couple of phone calls during the day to her agent and polishes a pretty packet. She earns in one week, what I slog for in one whole year !
    Hard work doesn’t pay pretty notes. If someone says that he/she derives “soul satisfaction” from the job, it is merely a euphemism for “the bleeding remuneration sucks”.

  2. radicalhypocrite

    Er, ahem, where is the exact location of Lazipore?

    Does it bestow honorary citizenship to does who wish to ‘work’ from home? 😛

  3. radicalhypocrite

    oops! I missplet ‘those’ as ‘does’. Hope that doesn’t make you angry!

  4. How much hard work did you put into that post, I wonder! It took me only a few seconds of lazy reading to get more out it than what you must have put in. Exploitation!

    And, the commies are revolting for the right to work. Exploitation, again!

  5. Lakshmi:
    Dad added a few spices to the general content, as usual!
    🙂
    Radicalhypocrite:
    I am really angry that you misspelt misspelt missplet. Otherwise, welcome to the blog!

  6. I figured as much… it was intellectually advanced for a twelve year old. But he’ll blow his audience away. It’s really well-written. Kudos to both of you!

  7. Witty! (I’m too lazy to say more.)

  8. HARD WORK NEVER KILLED ANYBODY, BUT WHY TAKE A CHANCE?
    😉

  9. The Lazy Limerick

    There once was a man from Peru
    Whose limericks stopped at line two.
    N’joy

  10. well so many unknown talents u have
    why not use ur vocal abilities to good use
    i meant that of eradicating the mosquito menace

    othrwise 🙂 as normal

  11. well so many unknown talents u have !
    why not use ur vocal abilities to good use
    i meant that of eradicating the mosquito menace

    otherwise 🙂 as usual

  12. As usual ROTFL… Adding ya to my blogroll Doc… I think I am gonna visit often 🙂

  13. radicalhypocrite, I could fight with you on your statement, had this been my blog, or you had not added the smilie after your statement. I very often wonder if I should have had an outside “office” to rest. My husband who goes “out” to work is usually fresh and relaxed when he gets back home, while work-from-home poor me is always on an overdrive ! Ask any work-from-home professional if they know the meaning of the word “lazy” !

  14. thanks for the post was goo………….

  15. Laxmi,
    the person you mentioned might lose in one day what you will spend in one year so don’t envy her.
    I agree with @ xntricpundits, HARD WORK NEVER KILLED ANYBODY, BUT WHY TAKE A CHANCE? I never take a chance.

  16. Nova,
    Thanks, and you’re always welcome!
    All,
    Thanks!

  17. hey doc,
    quite interesting to learn from a doctor who doubles up the job as a blogger too that he hardly believes in hard work or calls himself lazy.
    contradictory aint it??

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