TWEETING, TWITTING, SHI…. SAME DIFFERENCE?

I am using this post to publish some random thoughts that wouldn’t fit in any other category than ‘random thoughts’. So I thought I would post them like people do in Twitter, a site that proves once again that the greatest and most successful inventions these days have to be the most apparently useless ones. Okay, enough to ‘provocate’ (which is, you might agree, a much more ‘punchy’ word than ‘provoke’) Twitterers (or whatever they are called).

But, first, the soft sell: follow me at Twitter.

Here are my random thoughts of the day (without the 140 character limits):

Dell Computers are taking $99 from customers if they want local American voices answering their phone calls. It would be better to ask them to pay $999, and give them an iMac or something. Do Dell computers really work? Can you give me the serial number of the one that does?

Arun Shourie wants to take out Pakistan, Bush-style: “Two eyes for one, whole jaw for a tooth”. What say we send him and Sunny Deol to take out the LeT camps across the border?

A patient of mine who needed surgery for gallstones tells me, “I don’t want to take the risk of surgery, I want some medicines”. To which I replied, “You know what, that is like me saying the stock market is too risky, I am investing all my money in lottery tickets these days!”

Pre-payment penalties for home loans are going to go, says the Economic Times. Now that Mr. Chidambaram is Home Minister, we will face payment penalties if we pay the home loans. Home loan waivers, as Ramesh Shrivats said, are the way to go!

Pranab Mukherjee had a hacking cough while gargling away the smell of the Hilsa fish he had for lunch. The Pakistanis immediately readied their army for war. You see, when he speaks English threatening dire consequences, they think he is just gargling, and vice versa.

Now I need to get back to work.

25 responses to “TWEETING, TWITTING, SHI…. SAME DIFFERENCE?

  1. Hilarious!! I also joined twitter long back but became active on the site just few days ago, once I figured people write anything they like which necessarily may not the reply to the question “what are u doing”.

  2. πŸ™‚ I didn’t know you are a twitting witty surgeon.
    @Reema: and I deleted so many of my tweets because you said they were not replies to ‘what are you doing”… 😦

  3. Ha! Some lousy twit comes up with a software that apparently does nothing, and overnight, it becomes famous! Apart from being something to do in boring meetings, I don’t find twitter useful at all…
    Reminds me of The Really Big Button That Doesn’t Do Anything! Remember that? πŸ˜€

  4. I am following you on twitter. This post is very random yet very funny and that’s exactly how Twitter is. Tweeting is fun. I mean look at my tweets and see how many quotes I have destroyed!

  5. πŸ˜€ witty post! Agreed about Dinesh’s use of Twitter πŸ˜‰ For me, it is a fun platform where i can share itty-bitty and random links with my blog friends.

  6. doc,
    I have heard of stock market being compared to beauty contests, and a a lot of other things, but gall bladder surgery? You deserve Nobels for medicine and economics πŸ™‚

    Nikhil wrote:
    … Apart from being something to do in boring meetings, I don’t find twitter useful at all…

    Right on, Nikhil! Now we know why Twitter has been so successful πŸ™‚

  7. NOYB-but-not-in-a-rude-way

    Nomad: //I didn’t know you are a twitting witty surgeon.//

    Oh, I think he just twitches a lot; wittiness is a side effect. There are meds for this, of course, but a surgeon will want surgery, not pills! πŸ™‚
    ps: I think u should tweet this issue seriously

  8. NOYB:
    So tweet!
    TRF:
    Thanks, but I need a Nobel for luck. As they say, ‘better to be a lucky surgeon than a good one!’
    Reema:
    Which Reema are you there in Twitter?
    Kiran, DB, Nomad:
    We all seem to be in for a mutual tweet.
    Nikhil:
    As TRF says, anything to do during meetings will sell big!

  9. Don’t know if Twitter is useless, but it is a great time waster for sure. I was doing perfectly fine without it. It’s just ‘one more thing’ on my TO-DO list now.

  10. Doc:

    What you get from Twitter depends on a) your followers and your following lists AND b) how many of them converse rather than broadcast.

    I have my own criteria for following people which serve my purposes.

    Many of my interesting discussions related directly or indirectly to work started on Twitter in the last few months and then went offline and continued there. I do not imagine much use for such conversations in your line of work but I have found a lot of usefulness there. But 140 chars does concentrate the mind.

    Further, I have some real life friends on Twitter with whom I banter mainly. I also started to follow a couple people who have interesting things to say but may not necessarily be dialectic (with me).

    Blaming a tool is like blaming a scalpel. It depends on the surgeon whether the scalpel is being used to make incisions or slit throats.

  11. I also have an account on Twitter but I have never used it. One blog is enough to take up all my time. πŸ™‚

  12. Doc, twitter shwitter is all fine, but please lets not misunderestimate Sunny Deol!

  13. Oh got it. My internet browsing is very regimented and conformist. Invisible to ads and new stuff like this. πŸ™‚

    It was interesting – the other day in parliament, Arun Shourie (in RS) and Advani (in LS) made contrasting speeches.

  14. Isn’t twitter the retarded cousin of facebook? Same jobless platform, but less baggage, I guess.

    I do remember having signed up at one point. It wasn’t that popular with any of my friends, so there was no ni-twit to chitter with. Should check if it’s still active.

    g

  15. Shefaly:
    I take your point. All leisure platforms are for people who want to use them, and not for those who don’t. Fair enough.
    Ruhi:
    I noted your time spent on Tw.
    Amit:
    I think you must be even more busy collecting awards.
    AD:
    Great word: misunderestimate. Bravo!
    Priyank:
    Twitter could give you new travel targets, who knows?

  16. Thanks doc. I have some more lined up πŸ˜‰

  17. lol, dell i heard is the best…but come on nothing is as bad a microsoft…

    and ya I do not know why i use twitter πŸ˜›

  18. R-Doc:

    I did not say it is a ‘leisure’ platform. Contrary to appearances, some of us are able to and do use it for work purposes. Of course surgery is less amenable to this sort of ‘networking’ than other lines of work πŸ™‚

    AD:

    That word was made up by Dubya, wasn’t it? It is a bona fide Bushism πŸ™‚

  19. Yeh twitter twitter kya hai..

  20. Pranab Mukherjee’s cough results in high alert, Masood Azhar is one day under house arrest, next day he is absconding, Dawood Ibrahim is visble to Indians only. Indian air force violates Pakistani airspace, then Zardari says it was a technical violation, today a formal protest is handed over to the Indian High Commision any idea which medicine or surgery cures this problem?What do you prescribe for people like AR Antulay- brain surgery, oral medicine or electric shocks?

  21. Subject:- Apathy of Senior Citizens.

    Sir,

    A few days back during a press conference hosted for the release of congress pole manifesto, the PM emphasized that the Govt. has taken some steps to minimize the effect of higher prices. They have increased the income of employees through pay commission report and that of farming community through MSP rise. Unfortunately the senior citizens have been totally ignored here . The main source of income of a senior citizen is his life long savings lying deposited in the banks or post offices. With the rates of interest slashed, their returns from funds deposited have diminished a lot. Other wise also half per sent higher interest difference on deposits of senior citizens is insufficient.
    Especially there is no pension for employees retired from boards and corporations. All they get only thousands rupees or so per month from contributory P F linked pension schemes. Even this pension amount remains the same through out the life, since it is not linked with price index, unlike other Govt. pensions.
    After a life long service to the nation, the apathy of senior citizens can be well understood. The Govt. should not forget its obligation towards them. The govt. should fix rupees five thousand as minimum PF linked pension besides paying 2 % more interest on deposits by senior citizens to match the way the senior citizens are being looked after by many countries in the world.

    Thanking you,

    Yours faithfully,
    Kulbir Singh Chadha,
    # 22 Preet Colony, Rajpura.
    Ph. 500822.

  22. Kulbiru:
    Yeah, right. Done.

  23. ITS A PITY INDIA IS BECOMING A SOFT STATE .PRODUCTIVITY OF PUBLIC FUNDS IS VERY DISMAL .LOOT IN THE DELIVERY PIPELINE FROM TOP TO BOTTOM IS RAMPANT . OUR CRISES /DISASTOR MGT. SKILLS R RUDIMENTORY . OUR FOREIGN POLICIES R SHAMEFUL . WE HAVE NO CLOUT IN OUR NEIGHBOURHOOD . GOOD SYSTEMS R BADLY MANAGED BY CORRUPT ,INCOMPETENT & UNPATRIOTIC SELFISH PEOPLE . WE NEED A MESSAIAH TO PULL US OUT OF THIS MESS . ANY IDEAS ? PLS. SUGGEST .

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