Category Archives: art

WHEN BLOGGING IS SHOT DEAD….

Why do famous bloggers stop blogging?

1. Is it because they forget their username/password and get locked out of their blog?

2. Is it because they start new websites and write for the development of that site?

3. Do they lose their speech because some greedy female fan bit off their tongue (a species of Ardentophilus linguophagicus)? Aside– do ‘they’ have a tongue or several tongues?

4. Do they get elected President?

5. Do they rub shoulders in fashion events with scantily clad nymphs who look like Asian Paints representatives? 

6. Do they lose their sense of humor and start writing columns for other websites?

DSC00133

DSC00131In case you guessed it, here is a holiday for two to Alaska from me– here is a priceless depiction of the erstwhile blogger Rambodoc (now occasionally seen, like a horse in pajamas, in social media like Twitter or Facebook) on the ramp. The pictures of sundry Asian Paints representatives rubbing their ample assets on his strong arms have been deleted by the Indian Government. 

Oh, and about the Alaska trip? Just buy the tickets. I will buy you a bear beer.

WEAKLY HUMERUS NEWS 03-15-08

TOP QUOTES OF THE WEEK

That shows you how the whole world is backwards. I mean you’ve got Democrats, who are supposed to be poor, paying $5,000 an hour for sex, and you’ve got Republicans, who are supposed to be rich, cruising airport bathrooms trying to get it for free. (Jay Leno)

I have heard that Eliot Spitzer engaged in some kinky things. When a reporter asked him what his favorite form of weird sex was with these professionals, he looked puzzled and replied “Beats me!” And supposedly, his wife tracked him to the hotel one night and called his room from the reception desk below. He said “I can’t talk to you now. I’m tied up at the moment.” (Charles Wukasch)

Do you know what the highest paid government position in this country is? Anybody know? It is working under New York Governor Eliot Spitzer. It pays like $5,000 an hour. (Jay Leno)

Governor Spitzer was caught on a federal wiretap arranging to meet a call girl in a famous Washington D.C. hotel. It’s not unusual. The number of women who came over on the Mayflower will never equal the number of women who came across at the Mayflower. (Argus Hamilton)

A word has been added to the dictionary. Spitzer, n., a person who spits in other peoples’ faces only to have it blow back in his own. (Scott Witt)

Prescription medications have been discovered in the drinking water supplies of at least 41 million Americans. Or, as President Bush calls that, the Republican health care plan. You drink eight glasses of water a day, you get all your drugs. You see, again, I don’t think President Bush understands this problem. Like today, he said, he read the report and was shocked to learn our tap water contains the chemical H2O. (Jay Leno)

Voters in two Vermont towns have called for the arrest of President Bush and Vice President Cheney should they ever visit. When President Bush was told the law was non-binding and symbolic, he said “Oh, you mean like the Constitution?” (Jim Barach)

Continue reading

WEAKLY HUMERUS NEWS 03-01-08

TOP QUOTES OF THE WEEK

Hillary Clinton still doing very well in one state: the state of denial. (Jay Leno)

According to a research, a big number of Americans are still reluctant to vote for minorities, which is bad news for blacks, women and Republicans. (Pedro Bartes)

The House Commerce Committee tried to force pro sports to freeze athletes’ blood and store it for future HGH testing. The administration opposes the idea, calling it unconstitutional. Republicans are constitutionally opposed to bleeding rich people. (Argus Hamilton)

Roger Clemens faces a perjury probe today for denying steroid use to the House Oversight Committee. It seems a little harsh to charge him with lying to Congress. It’s not like everybody believed him and invaded Iraq on the strength of what he said. (Argus Hamilton)

What do you call somebody at a Ralph Nader campaign rally? Ralph Nader. That’s the only one there. (Jay Leno)

Well, you know who’s thrilled that Nader is back in the race? John McCain. He’s not the oldest guy anymore. (Jay Leno)

Barack Obama was accused of plagiarizing words from another politician. He says it’s no big deal, that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself and that in four score and seven years from now, who will remember? (Jim Barach)

President Bush said that the economy was not in a recession, leading economists to conclude that the economy was in a recession. (Andy Borowitz)

The Secret Service ordered Dallas police to stop screening people for weapons as they entered an arena for Barack Obama’s speech Wednesday because the line was slow. There’s no reason to worry. For crying out loud, it’s Dallas, what could happen? (Argus Hamilton)

Obama and Hillary argued last night over which candidate the Republicans are most afraid of. Interesting. I don’t want to take sides here, but I think it’s pretty obvious which candidate Republicans are most afraid of: John McCain. (Jay Leno)

Several states are investigating Bud and Miller Brewing for caffeinated alcohol products. Apparently the drinks keep you just awake enough to get in your car and drive while drunk. (Jim Barach)

Continue reading

TOMORROW’S CITY CAR: A BRILLIANT NEW CONCEPT!

picture-1.png

I have seriously wondered if genius has genetic, hereditary roots. Or is it something geniuses eat?
Jeeves, the brainy genius of a “gentleman’s personal gentleman”, was fond of eating fish, which did a lot to energise his brain cells, Bertie Wooster always told us. Apart from the Curies (Marie and Pierre), my feeble mind cannot, off the cuff, recall other families where geniuses flourished. Oh, yes, the Marx brothers.
“Well, get to the effington post, will ya?”, you say, not without a less-than-benevolent look on your ugly face?

Well, here is the beef.

unknown-2.jpg
(Harsha with parents Kala and Ravi)

Harsha Ravi has been awarded, this very month, the title of the Australian Young Designer of The Year by Wheels magazine. He is, I am proud to say, my nephew. Hence the thought of genius being familial. Has mine rubbed off on him? A more reliable part of my brain asks me if there is any hope for his brilliance rubbing off on me, at an age when one fears that, tomorrow, one’s arteries could become stiffer than one’s sexual organs, especially in times of need.

What was the competition for the car design all about? Wheels said this before the competition:

On the 50th anniversary of the Fiat 500, we shall use the intervening technology to completely reinvent the urban vehicle. Functional, frugal and fun, our 500 will be a 2+1 design doubly true to its name: 500cc, 500kg. Design it.

unknown-11.jpg

Harsha just did that. And outdid himself, too.
Hear this from the judges and critics:

“[He has] applied technology in a way that made sense.”

Take, for example, its carbon-neutral, bioplastic body with 12 percent petroleum-based/88 percent corn-based plastic that reduces the energy needed to manufacture the panels by 30 percent.

The design presented as a wild concept, yet it brought thoroughly considered, integrated design with enough tech detail and illustration to flesh it out. Sargeant and Stolfo agreed: “He has obviously done a lot of research before even putting pen to paper.”

Despite its ahead-of-time technology — the zinc-air fuel cell, nano-paper battery and airless tyres were just the beginning — attention was also given to regional manufacture, right down to the illustration of a basket-weaver manufacturing the woven seat material, one of many touches that delighted and amused the judges.

unknown-3.jpg

What, essentially, is this car, GM Globetrotter, about?
Harsha says:

The GM Globetrotter is inventive as a lightweight, nimble urban vehicle aimed at various emerging and developed markets in 2017. A decade from now, the worldwide culture will be one of environmental consciousness, where increased awareness of climate issues will have engendered a scrutinising and well-educated Gen-Y consumer niche. They will demand aunthenticity and transparency in how a product’s lifecycle is managed
to reduce environmental harm.

unknown-4.jpg

Harsha goes on:

Given the likelihood that tomorrow’s consumers will be environment-sensitive, Globetrotter is designed from the ground-up and inside-out to be customisable and minimalistic at every step. It aspires to be functional, frugal, and fun, and gentle on the environment as well. The level of individualisation this offers to the consumer market allows for the car to seamlessly fit into virtually any global context.

What is it like to design a car? I asked Harsha.

The automotive design process begins by laying out vehicle architectures to act as templates for designers to start sketching over.
Car designers are often also art nuts, and have a profound understanding and appreciation of various creative media, which we draw upon for inspiration to create the visual surfaces of the car both inside and out.

unknown-5.jpg

He continues:

Once a 2D representation of the designer’s vision is seen to have potential, it is then translated by computer modelers into 3D space, a developmental process which runs in parallel with a tangible sculpture being carved out of a unique automotive clay. Often, it takes several iterations of the designer’s sketch, together with a dedicated team of designers, modelers, engineers, and software whizzes all combining their efforts over a 4-5 year period to ready the vehicle for manufacture.

Harsha says that automotive design is “deeply satisfying” for him, like a dynamic sculpture, “full of visual and emotive appeal.”

Now, considering that he is barely twenty, that is really insightful and philosophical. And lest I sound like the patronising uncle I don’t want to be, I shall stop right now.

Related reading: Harsha’s take on new car designs in Show And Tell, Wheels magazine.

OFFENDING MUSLIMS: IS THERE A HIDDEN AGENDA?

Living under the threat of a major, global Islamic outrage is Swedish artist Lars Vilks.

artartistcnn.jpg

This man had drawn a cartoon of the Prophet Mohammed as a dog. Of all things, a dog, reviled by Islam as a dirty and low animal! Al Qaida had placed a bounty on his head to the tune of around $150,000.
The two sides of this issue are clearly polarised and typical: the artist’s ‘right to expression’ versus the religious outrage and vengeance that is mandated by Islam for any such act of sacrilege.

artburqacnn.jpg

Now, I have always been on the side of the underdog, no pun intended. I have defended the rights and freedoms of artists in the past, and have attacked religions for their essential irrationality, intolerance and collectivism.
However, on this event, I have my own two cents to offer.
I think this is a publicity stunt by a mediocre artist who has ambitions to historic immortality. Aspirations to the eternal glory of being the one to cock a heroic snook at the Islamists who, the West knows from experience, are intolerant to anything outside their book. He probably must feel that the risk to his life will be covered anyways by the State, and that he will tide over the immediate threats, then end up basking in the permanent fame brought about by world-wide media attention.
I have to ask why an artist (though he is well within his rights to do so) feels the need to paint or draw Jesus as a pedophile, or the Prophet Mohammed as a dog. Is his atheism overwhelming him such that he cannot but be so offensively contemptuous of religious figures? Or he has no other issues that command his attention?
I rather think not. I feel this is a good business tactic. Vilks’ next commission will be worth a fortune because this controversy is great for his business.
Perhaps it is time for us to take a break from spending our time defending these artistic rabble rousers and identify them for what they could well be: opportunistic mediocrities that need to be ignored.
Ignore this: who am I kidding? These actions are calculated to cause the maximum offense to the target audience. The artist surely knows that no Muslim can ignore this. Hence, as a strategy, this is invariably successful.
However, even if the world ignores this ‘art’, it would underscore one important point that Vilks himself advocates: “If you don’t like it, don’t look at it. And if you look at it, don’t take it too seriously. No harm done, really.”
Except to his own (expensive) safety and peaceful existence.

(Picture credits: CNN.com)