IF I HAD A FOOD BLOG….

Have you any idea of how bad a food (or travel) blogger I would have been? People would have called my posts ‘flogging‘, akin to vlogging that people do to realise the cost of the webcam they bought (originally to do the dirty things the internet supposedly encouraged but they never found courage for). Do taste the flavor of my flogging, once you repeat after me, “Long Post Alert!”

I have been known to enjoy my holidays, and have blogged about them before, and a not-too-past trip to South Africa was outstanding in every way.

 So, you could say I was spoiled there with good food like braised lamb shanks.

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I even loved the exotic steak meats like the crocodile and the ostrich.

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The fearless gourmet in me even dared to sample the kind of foods even those bred on eating meats would baulk at—sample the typical jerky-style dried beef, ostrich, deer, antelope, and bigger game. 

DSC01485(These jerkies would go well with beer and a game of football, the Africans would have you believe.)

At Cape Town’s famous restaurantDSC01499 Mama Africa, I chickened out of 

DSC01629the invertebrates in the menu!DSC01502

And all the exotic food and drink were enjoyed in backdrops that are the stuff of dreams and hallucinations.

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Don’t miss the author’s celebrated feet as he savors his cheap and excellent South African wine in the midst of the Kruger while watching elephants mate (or whatever it is that they do when not taking gigantic craps).

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So (hello, readers, are you still there?) with this African experience not having entirely receded from my mind, I ventured off recently to Thailand with minimal expectations.

I had been to that country several times before, and what would be different this time? Leela was very kind when giving me a list of places to eat, and I thought I would somehow endure the few days of holidaying in Bangkok and Phuket.

As my cynical mind suspected, I was spot on.

In Phuket, the weather was gloomy, as we saw from the hotel.

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 The room had only two verandahs with ocean views, and only one of them was air-conditioned! Gasp, I thought, what has this world come to!

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In addition, there were little animals in the room, which kind of competed for space in the tiny suite provided.

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The nearby events in Samao and Indonesia were reminders of how perilously perched our world often is.

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The Thai Engrees made things more fun.

DSC02788(helloo! Can you hear me?)

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(come in side, but chill out side, geddit? Hopefully, the verb meant a form of leg movement!)

In Phuket’s Jung Ceylon mall, there is an excellent food court, with Wine Connection (a restaurant that serves the most incredible chocolate moose mousse and caramel custard,  unfortunately un-captured in photographs as they had incredibly short table lives) standing out for class. The KFC in there (and in other places) has a Thai curry-style fried chicken that is an experience! Such a spicy and delectable chicken dish is really unusual! My son had it every day (I kid you not), not heeding my stern warnings about trans fats and atherosclerosis.

In Bangkok, as Leela had recommended, I decided to have dinner at Cabbages and Condoms. However, I had not reckoned with the awesome traffic.

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In fact, bikes and scooters were riding gaily on the pavements, a la India. 

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 At the restaurant, the starters were exceptional, specially the prawn with peppers, the tom yum goong, and the catfish salad (it has spiced raw mangoes in it).

The restaurant, in spite of its name and its social purpose (they serve condoms in place of mints), is tastefully designed.

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I was wondering what the heck the fried thing in the salad was, though the name said it was catfish. It was as if egg fritters were fried in hot oil. Delicious and unique. The chicken tom kha soup I had was good, but slightly sweet. Not bad at all, but I love a more creamy tom kha.

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The entreé of deep fried pork in garlic pepper was disappointing (they burned the garlic, I think), but the chicken in lemongrass was excellent. In the pic, you can see the pork and the jasmine rice (including a unique red variety) in the background, and the chicken in front.

I must say I had planned to eat Tab Tim Krob, the delicious water chestnut sweet, after Leela’s post on it. I was not disappointed. This was in one of the Be Siam (or some such) restaurants.

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Bei Otto:

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Another evening, it was time to try Bei Otto, a German restaurant (possibly the only good one in Bangkok)  located in Sukhumvit. 

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A simple grill platter of German bratwurst, pork chops and veal cutlets, served with sauerkraut and mashed potatoes, was enough to sate three of us, though I had, gastronomically speaking, a relative off day. Dessert was mangoes served with cream and ice cream and a light filo pastry. Amazing. Definitely worth a visit every time!

Restaurants apart, even the food courts in the many malls of Bangkok offer uncountable treats for the foodie. I had sushi like I have never had before. Cream pastries. Cakes. Miso soups. Pad thai. Oh, I am already tired, with so many foods I have yet to list!

The street food is eclectic. You can find incredible junk, and you can find delicious local specialties like grilled bananas. I believe they sell frog legs but I never got to eat or see that!

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 So, in summary, I hope I have convinced you that Thailand is one country I am definitely not planning to visit in a long time, till next year, anyways. Especially considering that I gained ten pounds in eight days.

The only reason that I can think of is it might, just might, get me a guest post in some celeb blog like  http://www.shesimmers.com. Or maybe not. Once bitten, twice Thai, I mean, shy!

20 responses to “IF I HAD A FOOD BLOG….

  1. mm.. yummy

  2. my two favorite places in the world! South africa more than thailand! although phuket was a disaster in the food issue for me! being a vegetarian and seeing red meat everywhere is a nightmare! but the shopping more than makes up for it 🙂

    How was the mopani worm? we need detailed description!

  3. A food blog along with a fitness blog makes business sense 🙂

  4. awesome food post!! And Imagine during all this time u didnt tweet about the calories and grams while eating even once!! 😛 😛

  5. Thanks, Reema. Yes, imagine me not mentioning cals and grams! The reason is I could not count them. On average, I must have overshot my caloric budget by a few thousand every day for a week!
    Prerna:
    Actually, it is, but in my innocence, I did not realise it at all!
    Perplexed:
    I chickened out of the worms, as I said.
    Maplesyrup:
    Thanks, I hope you enjoyed that!

  6. Vivek Khadpekar

    Nice to see you back, Doc.

    Umm…other than gorging on all those culinary delights, did you do anything else that you can share with your readers? Do we look forward to another post on that?

  7. So you’ve eaten crocodiles, ostriches, chickens, lambs, cows, and there’s still more to go.

    It’s like a veritable Noah’s ark being built up in there! 😉

    I dont eat meat, but all the food mentioned here has me suddenly feeling hungry. Let me go find something to snack on!

  8. Nice food picture rdoc. And good to see you on this blog. However I think you are not going to drop in here for a while now! 🙂 You are enjoying yourself too much, what with all the gyming, the doctoring and the travelling. I am sure I missed out some other activities! 😉

  9. Nita:
    Haha, you must be guessing right, I think!
    Vivek:
    I am an animal: I live to eat, grow strong and write long blog posts. Nothing else!
    AD:
    Vegetarians are big time losers, unfortunately. But make the best of it, dude!

  10. You got me thinking food !
    now i gotta go and eat something.
    Second Vivek …

  11. Nice food & travel logs! And the scenery’s are breath-taking! I am yearning for an oasis vacation.

  12. That food looks amazing! Maybe with the exception of the worms…nasty. Everything looks so fresh. Nice travel log. Thanks for sharing!

  13. Glad I ate just before I read the blog. I made my aunt’s recipe for “Mutton chops”, substituting chicken instead of the mutton. And I finished off my Chicken in herb and wine with pesto sandwich.

    The chicken at Mama Africa, what was the prep? Herbed and breaded chicken with thousand island?

    Also, jerky is probably the most popular item on the American football fans’ menu. Those look just delectable.

    I am a little squeamish when it comes to odd foods (I have yet to try pig feet which my Mexican friends have me believe is absolutely delicious), but I would love to try worms some day. I saw a video of a little kid eating one, those kids are so care free.

    When I get around to eating worms, I’ll be sure to post plenty of pics, for proof, and just to see a few people squirm.

    P.S. I can’t believe you even ordered anything deep fried!

  14. Your website is very useful. Thanks for sharing.

  15. Everything looks so delicious!

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  17. Hi there! I simply would like to give an enormous thumbs up for the nice information you’ve got right here on this post.
    I might be coming back to your weblog for more soon.

  18. hmmm, cabbage and condoms? I hope it was the aforementioned you had on the plate 🙂

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